Exciting news in the not-so-exciting world o' Smess
Let's see...what's been going on in my life...well pretty crazy stuff as usual...oh yeah and on another note...Dave, I didn't get a comment from you...you got my hopes up and then you left me hanging...I'm not sure what happened, but there was no comment from you or anybody for that matter. But oh well, you should try harder this time. Right now I'm in the 'brary taking a break from planning my art lesson for tomorrow...little nervous right now. I don't know, I have a million thoughts running through my head that have been there all day. I'm not sure what's going on in my life but hopefully I can figure it out soon. I'm thinking a lot about the conversation that I had with Dave last night/this morning and trying to make sense about what he said. (Believe me, it's hard...just joshin' Dave, I love ya!) I have this mind set that nobody really misses me when I'm not around and that people don't really notice when I am. This is probably part of the reason (although not most of it) that I can't go away to school. I don't like the idea that nobody would miss me and I think that if they didn't it would be to hard. So I don't know. This time last year I was praying for a group of girl friends and now I find myself praying for just one person to want to be my best friend (and although I'm Miller's friend of the month, it's just not the same) I don't know maybe I'm just in major boyfriend mode because I want someone to call me and tell me good nite and that they're thinking of me. I want someone to ask how my day went, stuff like that. I don't know, but if this is just a boyfriend mode thing then I hope I get over it soon or someone asks me out or something. That's what I've been praying for also a lot lately. To either have God take away the lonliness or to give me someone to take it away or at least give me a sign and that's what the last blog was about. I asked for a sign and I thought that He gave it to me, but after observing the thing closer, He must be crazy if He wants me to follow through with it because I'm just going to get hurt...but I don't know...I wonder how many times I said "I don't know" in this blog but oh well, the truth is, I really don't and that's all I really do know...man this was a depressing blog...oh well, it happens.
posted by Smess @ 12:41 PM
5 Comments:
Sorry Dave, but your post just now came through...crazy, huh??
Smess,
I understand about going away to school and wondering if anyone really misses you when you're not around. Cuz lets face it, I still think that sometimes. It's natural. Friends will be your friends, whether far or near. They will miss you, why? Because they are your friends and that's what friends do. Smess, just so you know, I notice when you're around. ;~)
Gerry
P.S. - To answer your question, 6.5 times you said "I don't know". The last time you said "I really don't" so that only counts as half. :~P
Thanks for your comment Gerry...it really meant a lot... and I miss you! :o)
Hey buddy,
Now that I now your where your blog is I can get some insight into that head of yours, lol. Then again, I suppose I already have more insight than other people since we do share a brain (or half a brain as Gerry would say). I want you to know that I would miss you like crazy if you went away. When you were talking about going to EKU I was scared to death because I would miss you so much. I'm sorry that I don't tell you that enough. I am always here for you, although I know I can't be your boyfriend. You've seen me through so many things I don't know what I'd do without you! I LOVE YOU BUDDY!!!!!!!!!!
Well, I haven't been good about commenting/posting and such. I have been too busy to notice your blog, but I'll never be too busy not to notice you're around. I guess it's not fair that we are all at different points in our lives; some of our friends are finishing up school and moving on, while others are just deciding their major.
This is one flaw I see with our group of friends. It's one of the few flaws. We are not the same, though; I wouldn't want friends who I see every fiv minutes, every day because I would get used to them and start atking them for granted.
Cuzz, have you been thinking about the lesson God is trying to teach you? He has lain some heavy things on your heart right now. I think it is because He knows you have an excellent support system here. Just think if He waited till you left for college to teach you this stuff...you may not have been able to handle it, then.
Although it doesn't seem like it, I am here for you. I love you (more than a kitty kat loves cream). I will love you still if you go away for school; and I will still love you if you stay here.
If you need me, call me, I'll be there!!
Love, me
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