wahoo

So yeah...It's been a crazy couple of days, that's for sure...It's like my retreat roller coaster of emotions has already started and the retreat's not for 2 days. Crazy, huh?? So yeah on a happy note: I finally got my new computer so I can now get on the internet while at my house...Crazy, huh?? So yeah...Back to that emotional roller coaster...Let's see. The overnighter is always for me a time to hang out with people who I don't usually get to from team and a time I can use to work on my personal self, relationships with friends, and my relationship with God. Starting off a mini-retreat with these thoughts in mind always put me on the brink of tears from the beginning. So yeah the overnighter was an emotional one for me, although not completely productive. I didn't really work on the things that I wanted to going into the night and that's okay, although kinda a disappointment. Then to top in off, I felt horrible about missing the ropes course. So horrible that I cried the whole way home. And I know that was dumb, but we'll just blame it on only getting an hour of sleep. Mommy's birthday was fun and Rick's party was fun and I got to talk to people who I don't talk to all that often. Monday night at Schalk's was also fun. Kelly and I stayed up talking about stuff that I don't talk about ever and it was good to get it out. Then on Tues. I found out that my site had the highest state rating in Campbell Co. So that was a really good surprise. And I was so exhausted when I got home from class, I crashed-hard. I slept from like 9:30-8 in the morning...It was crazy. My daddy even tried to wake me up to go to clean-up and I didn't budge. All that emotional crap really wore me out, I guess. So yeah...Good week so far and I'm looking forward to the retreat, mostly because my relationship with God needs a pick-me-up...I've been totally slaking in that department and I'm not even sure what to do about it. But hopefully this retreat is just what I need. This past retreat wasn't one of my favorites and I'm a little scared that this retreat will be the same. I'm really happy with my table: I have CJ and Lubbers which is so totally cool. I know that I'll probably be a wreck this weekend, I've cried more on the last couple than I use to, I guess I'm just getting soft in my old age...And I'm sure that it won't help matters that Fay's talk is one of the first one's of the weekend. That boy made me cry with his practice talk. I know that he has had a hard time with forgiving himself for hurting me, but I wish he wouldn't. I won't deny that I was very hurt in the beginning, but I got over it really quickly. I love him like a brother and siblings have disagreements from time to time. So yeah, now I'm just completely rambling on and on and I know that I'm probably not making any sense what so ever, so I should probably not type anymore in fear of making a complete idiot out of myself, so I'm just gonna stop. There is one more thing that I would like to talk about in here, but I think that I'll just wait until after the weekend because it's something that I can't think anymore about right now. So until next time...Who knows maybe I'll even have 2 blogs in one week this time...Now that would be crazy!!